Letters to Heaven (#6)

Dear Chotte,

 Apologies for the absence all these years.

We are in a pandemic. Yes, the entire world, due to a freaking virus. How crazy does that sound? It has been over a year now, and most of India (and the rest of the world) has been locked down since 2020 - No dinners, no games, no movement; every single person indoors. But you know all this, don’t you?

I let you down, Chotte; a lot. I am definitely not the person you once knew me or ever wanted me to be. But so did you. They say all alive and dead are a part of this one cosmos. Where and why have you been hiding then?  Is it because I have been out of fuel in my love tank and been filling myself with hate? (Something I mindlessly have managed to do for a while now). 

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Anyways, it’s a happy day for you, happy-happy things here.

You must have met Ammamma by now, na? ऐश करो दोनों|

I stopped Sanskashti too, by the way. The old me would have called this a sign/coincidence but no, not anymore. As fate would have it, आज संकष्टी है! Ab tere liye itna toh banta hai. Idli nahi khaaya toh kya, Aamras banaaya aur khilaya bhi. You would have licked the entire thing without even sharing, I know.

I had fun despite the lockdown. I hope your friends all over are celebrating in your name today.

I hope you find this and find your way to me. 

You know everything. Bacha le, Chotte; this is my wish. (FTW for calling me weak)

And if I have learned anything at all, it takes the life, soul, and courage out of anyone who has loved deeply and freely, to stop loving. It really does. Hence, I will channel all that lost love to you. I know you will take anything I give.

Happy birthday, you.
P.S I shall toast in your name post lockdown, pakka.